My very wise friend said (she used to be clairvoyant by the way)...
"But I have learned that the best thing we can pray for in times of distress is for grace. Because we can't do it on our own. We need God, we need His grace to take as through what some call the dark night of the soul. On our own, it's like we're groping around blindly--trying to fill the void with many things that we think will solve it but will not, but with God's grace we have a guiding hand, we have His strength to pull us eventually through....
We need God's grace to help us figure out what's messing us up, and, when we realize that we need to change, we will need His grace to do what needs to be done, to change things in ourselves and to deal with the people who matter to us."
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