I've dreaded Fridays for a while now, well, ever since I started feeling empty, longing to do something else or be somewhere else. Remember that night I almost slept in the office because I was sooo...oh emotionally unstable, as my intern calls it, then offers me vodka afterwards.
Anyway, tonight feels different. I am starting to feel that overwhelming sense of independence again. That feeling that I do not have to be with someone else, with you even (apart from kiddo, who is spending Fridays and Saturdays with the in-laws till we move--but that's another story which deserves another post altogether).
Remember I told you Friday is the saddest day of the week? Well, its beginning not be be like that anymore. Tonight, I feel like I can survive it, alone. I planned to shop away, but a looming big ticket move prevented me from doing that. So I opted for a quiet place in the middle of the busiest place in the whole of Metro Manila. Lucky me, I found two spots where I can stay in peace.
Remember when I used to be so emotionally dependent on you. But I am starting to change. I still have moments when I feel like I need to be with you--and I feel that almost everyday still, but I can handle them all now. Trying is more the operative word. But despite the independence, I feel sad still. Sad because you don't seem to care. Sad because nothing matters anymore. And sad because I feel empty. But what can I do? I need to pass time. And I suppose, in the same manner, you do too.
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